Reunion on Rocky Shores Read online

  “You’re the best dancer I’ve danced with tonight,” she said when the song was almost at an end. “Simon stepped on my toes a million times and I think he even broke one. And Chloe’s dad wouldn’t stop looking at Sage the whole time we danced. I think that’s rude, don’t you, even if they did just get married. Grown-ups are weird.”

  Will couldn’t help it, he looked down at Maddie’s animated little face and laughed out loud.

  “You have a nice laugh,” she observed, watching him through her wise little eyes that had endured too much. “I like it.”

  “Thanks,” he answered, a little taken aback.

  “You know what?” she whispered, as if confiding state secrets, and he had to bend his head a little lower to hear her, until their faces were almost touching.

  “What?” he whispered back.

  “I like you, too.” She smiled at him, then before he realized what she intended, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek.

  He stared at her as her words seemed to curl through him, squeezing the air from his lungs and sending all the careful barriers he thought he had built around his heart tumbling with one big, hard shove.

  “Thanks,” he finally said around the golf ball-size lump in his throat. “I, uh, like you, too.”

  It wasn’t quite true, he realized with shock. His feelings for this little girl and her brother ran deeper than simple affection.

  He had tried so hard to keep them all at bay but somehow when he wasn’t looking, Julia’s twins had sneaked into his heart. He cared about them—Simon, with his inquisitive mind and his eagerness to please, and Maddie with her unrelenting courage and the simple joy she seized from life.

  How the hell had he let such a thing happen? He thought he had been so careful around them to keep his distance but something had gone terribly wrong.

  He remembered Maddie offering to eat her ice cream slowly so he could have a taste if he wanted, Simon talking about baseball and inviting him to watch a Mariners’ game, budding hero worship in his eyes.

  He loved Julia’s children.

  Just as he loved their mother.

  He stopped stockstill on the dance floor. It couldn’t be true. It couldn’t. His gaze found Julia, standing at the refreshment table talking to Anna. She looked graceful and lovely. When she felt his gaze, she turned and gave him a tentative smile and he suddenly wanted nothing more than he wanted to yank her into his arms and carry her out of here.

  “Are you okay, Mr. Garrett?” Maddie asked.

  “I…yes. Thank you for the dance,” he said, his voice stiff.

  “You’re welcome. Will you come play Barbies with me sometime?”

  He had to get out of there, right now. The noise and the crowd were pressing in on him, suffocating him.

  “Maybe. I’ll see you later, okay?”

  She nodded and smiled, then slipped away. On his way out the door, his gaze caught Julia’s one more time and he hoped to hell the shock of his newfound feelings didn’t show in his expression.

  She gave him another tentative smile, which he acknowledged with a jerky nod, then he slipped out the door.

  He climbed into his pickup in a kind of daze and pulled out of The Sea Urchin’s parking lot in the pale twilight, not knowing where he was heading, only that he had to get away. He thought he was driving aimlessly, following the curve of the ocean, but before he quite realized it, he found himself at the small cemetery at twilight, just as the sunset turned the waves a soft, pale blue.

  He parked outside the gates, knowing he didn’t have long since the cemetery was supposed to be closed after dark. Leaves crunched underfoot as he followed the familiar path, listening to the quiet reverence of the place.

  He stopped at his father’s grave first, under the spreading boughs of a huge, majestic oak tree. It was a fitting resting place for a man who could work such magic with his hands and a piece of wood. He stopped, head bowed, remembering the many lessons he had learned from his father. Work hard, play hard, cherish your family.

  Not a bad mantra for a man to follow.

  After long moments, he let out a breath and walked over a small hill to Abigail’s grave, decorated with many tokens of affection. Sage had left her a wedding invitation, he saw, and a flower from her bouquet, and Will couldn’t help smiling.

  He saved the toughest for last. With emotion churning through him, he followed the trail around another curve, almost to the edge by the fence, where two simple headstones marked Robin and Cara’s graves.

  He hadn’t been here in a few months, he realized with some shock. Right after the accident he used to come here every day, sometimes twice a day. He had hated it, but he had come. Those visits had dwindled but he had always tried to come at least once a week to bring his wife whatever flowers were in season.

  Like Abigail, Robin had loved flowers.

  Guilt coursed through him as he realized how he had neglected his responsibilities.

  He rounded the last corner and there they were, silhouetted in the dying sun. Two simple markers—Robin Cramer Garrett, beloved wife. Cara Robin Garrett, cherished daughter.

  Emotions clogged his throat. Oh, he missed them. He walked closer, then he blinked in shock, certain the dusky twilight must be playing tricks with his eyesight.

  A few weeks after the accident, Abigail had asked him if she could plant a rosebush between Robin and Cara’s graves. He had been wild with grief, inconsolable, and wouldn’t have cared whether she planted a whole damn flower garden, so he had given his consent.

  He hadn’t paid it much attention, other than to note a few times in the summer that if she had still been alive, Abigail would have been devastated to know she must have planted a sterile bush. He hadn’t seen a single bloom on it in two years.

  Now, though, as he stood in the cool October air, he stared in shock at the rosebush. It was covered in flowers—hundreds of them, in a rich, vibrant yellow.

  This couldn’t be right. He didn’t know a hell of a lot about horticulture but he was fairly certain roses bloomed in summer. It was mid-October now, and had been colder than usual the last few weeks, rainy and dank.

  It made absolutely no sense but he couldn’t ignore the evidence in front of him. Abigail’s roses were sending their lush, sweet fragrance into the air, stirring gently in a soft breeze.

  Let go, Will. Life moves on.

  He could almost swear he heard Abigail’s words on the breeze, her voice as brisk and no-nonsense as always.

  He sank down onto the wooden bench he had built and stared at the flower-heavy boughs, softly caressing the marble markers.

  Let go.

  His breathing ragged, he gazed at the flowers, stunned by the emotion pouring through him like a cleansing, healing rainstorm, something he hadn’t known since his family was taken from him with such sudden cruelty.

  Hope.

  It was hope.

  These roses seemed a perfect symbol of it, a precious gift Abigail had left behind just for him, as if she knew that somehow he would need to see those blossoms at exactly this moment in his life to remind him of things he had lost along the way.

  Hope, faith. Love.

  Life moves on.

  Whether he was ready for it or not, he loved Julia Blair and her children. They had showed him that his life was not over, that if he could only find the courage, his future didn’t have to be this grim, empty existence.

  She had roared back into his life like a hurricane, blowing away all the shadows and darkness, the bone-deep misery that had been his companion for two years.

  He couldn’t say the idea of loving her and her kids still didn’t scare the hell out of him. He had already lost more than he could bear. But the idea of living without them—of going back to his gray and cheerless life—scared him more.

  He sat on the bench for a long time while the cemetery darkened and the roses danced and swayed in the breeze, surrounding him with their sweet perfume.

  When at last he stood up, his chee
ks were wet but his heart felt a million times lighter. He headed for the cemetery gates, with only one destination in mind.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  “Mama, I just love weddings.” Though she was drooping with fatigue, Maddie’s eyes were bright as Julia helped her out of her organza dress.

  “It was lovely, wasn’t it?”

  “Sage was so pretty in her dress. She looked like an angel. And Chloe did a good job throwing the flower petals, didn’t she? She didn’t even look one bit nervous!”

  Julia smiled at Maddie’s enthusiasm. “She was the best flower girl I’ve ever seen.”

  “Do you think when you get married, I could wear a dress like Chloe’s and throw flower petals, too?”

  She winced, not at all sure how to answer. “Um, honey, I’ve already been married, to your dad,” she finally said.

  “But you could get married again, couldn’t you? Chloe said you could because her dad was already married before, too, to her mom. Then her mom died just like Daddy and now her dad is married again to Sage.”

  Julia forced a smile. “Isn’t it lucky he found Sage?”

  She, on the other hand, had given her heart to Will Garrett, wholly and completely, and somehow she knew she would never be able to love anyone else. Will wasn’t ready for it. For all she knew, he would never be ready. If Will couldn’t bring himself to love her back, she was afraid she would spend the rest of her life alone.

  But she wasn’t about to confide her heartache to her daughter. “You need to get to sleep, kiddo. It’s been a big day and I know you’re tired. Simon’s already in his bed, sound asleep.”

  She helped Maddie into her nightgown and was tucking her under the covers when Maddie touched her hand.

  “Mama, I think you should marry Mr. Garrett.”

  Julia nearly tripped over Maddie’s slippers in her astonishment. “Wh…why would you say that?”

  “Well, lots of reasons. He smells nice and I just love the dollhouse he made me.”

  Not the worst reasons for a seven-year-old girl to come up with to marry a man, she supposed.

  “And maybe if you married him, he wouldn’t be so sad all the time. You make him smile, Mama. I know you do.”

  Tears burned in her eyelids at Maddie’s confident statement and she knelt down to fold her daughter into her arms.

  “Go to sleep, pumpkin,” she said through the emotions clogging her throat. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

  She turned off the light and closed her door, then moved to Simon’s room to check on him. He was sleeping soundly, his blankets already a tangle at his waist. She tucked them back over his shoulders then returned to the living room, lit only by a small lamp next to her Stickley rocking chair.

  Though she tried to fight the impulse, she finally gave in and moved to the window overlooking Will’s house. No lights were on there, she saw. Was he asleep already?

  He was leaving in the morning. Maybe he intended to get a solid night’s rest for traveling across the country.

  The emotions Maddie had stirred in her finally broke free and she felt tears trickling down her cheeks. He hadn’t said a word to her all day. She had felt his gaze several times, both during the ceremony and then after at the reception, but he hadn’t approached her.

  After his dance with Maddie, she had intended to track him down—if only to tell him goodbye before he left for his new job—but he had rushed out of The Sea Urchin so fast she hadn’t had the chance.

  She didn’t need a pile of two-by-fours to fall on her head to figure out he didn’t want to talk to her again.

  She swiped at her tears with her palm. He hadn’t even left town yet and she already missed him like crazy. Despite her determined claims to him that she wouldn’t regret making love, she couldn’t deny that the tender intimacy they had shared had only ratcheted up her pain to a near-unbearable level.

  Sage’s joy today had only served to reinforce to Julia that she was unlikely ever to know that kind of happiness with Will. He might have opened up his emotions to her a few nights ago but now they were as tightly locked and shoved away as they had been since she returned to town. If she needed proof, she only had to look at the careful distance he maintained at the wedding.

  What a strange journey she had traveled since making the decision to return to Cannon Beach. She never would have guessed when she took that teaching job several months ago that she would find love and heartbreak all in one convenient package.

  He was leaving in the morning and she could do nothing to stop him.

  She sobbed, just a little, then the sound caught in her throat when she suddenly thought she smelled freesia.

  “Oh, Abigail,” she murmured. “I wish you were here to tell me what to do, how I can reach Will. I don’t think I can bear this.”

  Silence met her impassioned plea, but an instant later she jumped a mile when she felt something wet brush her hand.

  “Conan! You scared the life out of me! Where were you?”

  The dog had followed her and the twins upstairs when they returned to Brambleberry House from the wedding, apparently needing company since Anna was still busy cleaning up at the reception and Sage and Eben were staying at The Sea Urchin for the night until they left for their honeymoon in the Galapagos in the morning.

  He must have gone into her room to lie down, since she hadn’t seen him when she came out of Simon’s room and had forgotten he was even there. Still, she had to admit she was grateful for the company. The dog leaned against her leg, offering his own unique kind of support and sympathy.

  “Thanks,” she whispered, as they sat together in her dim apartment looking out at the lights of town.

  But his steady comfort didn’t last long. After a moment, his ears pricked up and he suddenly barked and rushed for the door, his tail wagging.

  She sighed. “You want to go out again? We let you out when we came home!”

  He whined a little and watched her out of those curiously intelligent eyes. With a sigh, she abandoned any fleeting hope she might have briefly entertained about sinking into a hot bubble bath to soak away her misery, for a while anyway.

  “All right, you crazy dog. Just let me find some shoes first.”

  She had changed after the reception into worn jeans and her oldest, most comfortable sweater. Now she grabbed tennis shoes and headed down the stairs.

  The moment she opened the outside door, Conan rocketed down the porch steps and toward the front gate, then disappeared from sight.

  Oh rats. She forgot to check that the gate was still closed. Conan usually stuck close to home, preferring his own territory, but if he smelled a cat anywhere in the vicinity, all bets were off.

  What was she supposed to do now? No one else was home, the twins were sleeping upstairs and the dog was loose. She couldn’t let him wander free, though.

  “Conan,” she called. “Get back here.”

  He barked from what sounded like just the other side of the ironwork fence, but she couldn’t see him in the darkness.

  “Here, boy. Come on.”

  He didn’t respond to the command and with a sigh, she headed down the sidewalk, hoping he wasn’t in the mood for a playful game of tag. She wasn’t at all in the mood to chase him.

  “Come on, Conan. It’s cold.” She walked through the gate, then froze when she saw in the moonlight just why the dog hadn’t answered her summons.

  He was busy greeting a man who stood silent and watchful on the other side of the fence.

  Will.

  She stared at him, stunned to find him here, tonight, and wondering if she had left any evidence of the tears she had just shed for him. All those emotions just under the surface threatened to break through again—sorrow and regret, doubt, sadness.

  Love.

  Especially love.

  She wanted to go to him, throw her arms around his waist and beg him not to leave.

  “I didn’t see you there,” she said instead, hoping her emotional tumult didn’t sho
w up in her voice.

  He said nothing, just continued to pet the dog and watch her. She walked a little closer.

  “Is everything okay?”

  “No.” His voice sounded hoarse, ragged. “I don’t think it is.”

  He stepped closer to her, so near she could smell the scent of his aftershave, sexy and male. Her heart, already pounding hard since the instant she saw him standing in the darkness, picked up a pace.

  “What is it?”

  He was quiet for a long time—so long she was beginning to worry something was seriously wrong. Finally, to her immense shock he reached out and grasped her fingers and pulled her even closer.

  “I had to come. Had to see you.”

  “Why?”

  His slow sigh stirred her hair. “I love you, Julia.”

  “Wh-what did you say?” She jerked her hand away and scrambled back. Her heartbeat accelerated and she couldn’t seem to catch her breath as shock rippled through her.

  He raked a hand through his hair. “I didn’t mean to just blurt it out like that. I must sound like an idiot.”

  “I’m…I’m sorry. You don’t sound like an idiot. I just…I wasn’t expecting that. You’re leaving tomorrow. Aren’t you leaving?”

  A tiny flutter of joy started in her heart but she was afraid to let it free, afraid he would only crush it and leave her feeling worse than ever.

  “Yes. I’m leaving.”

  She expected his words but they still scored her heart. He said he loved her, but he was leaving anyway?

  “I wish I didn’t have to go but I gave my word to Eben and I’m committed, at least for a few weeks, until he can find someone else to take my place.”

  He reached for her hand again and she could feel her fingers trembling in his hard, callused palm. “And then I’d like to come back. To Cannon Beach and to you.”

  While she was still reeling from his words, he paused, then touched her cheek softly. “You were so right about everything you’ve said to me. I need to move forward, to give myself the freedom to taste all life has to offer again. It’s time. I’ve known it’s time, but I’ve been so afraid. That’s a tough thing for a man to admit, but it’s the truth. I was afraid to let myself love you, afraid I was somehow…betraying Robin and Cara by all the feelings I was starting to have for you.”